I’ve been writing more this month than past months. The Slice of Life story challenge has been a great way to challenge myself and connect with others during a month that has felt like 5 months with all the change and uncertainty.
I found myself feeling uncertain today. Perhaps it was due to the lack of sleep. The last I looked at the alarm clock was 12:04 AM. But then I continued to wake up what felt like every hour or two. I awoke at 4:30 AM. I tossed to my right side away from the clock. I listened to my husband’s breaths, deep and long. I heard the fan whirl, providing white noise more than cool air flow. The cat laid curled on her bed, every so often a small snort or sigh escaped from her. I sighed out of frustration.
I rolled onto my stomach. I squeezed my eyes tighter, knowing the clock time would only bother me more.
I tried to breath in and out, slowly. Every time my mind wandered to a worry, I attempted to reassure myself “It’ll be okay.”
But the worries crept in. My stomach ached… maybe from hunger, maybe from anxiety. I found myself curled on my side once again. Blankets pulled up to my chin, legs curled up, arms crossed, almost in the fetal position.
I find myself worried that I have Covid-19. I haven’t displayed any symptoms, but there’s the warning symptoms can show up 14 days after being exposed to the virus. While I know I’ve washed my hands and stayed in, I realize there are people or surfaces they’ve touched that I’ve come in contact with in the last 12 days since school has closed. This virus has changed so much in my life in the last month.
The news and coverage all over social media isn’t helping either. I watch and begin to worry. Is that a tickle I have in my throat? Is my chest feeling differently? Do I have a fever?
Only time will tell, but I hope my worries will go away soon.